話說子玉從會館回來，將琴官的戲足足想了兩日，以謂天下之美莫過於此。又將蘇蕙芳、陸素蘭、金漱芳、李玉林的色藝品評，都為絕頂。細細核來，蕙芳的神色尤勝於諸人，次則素蘭可以匹敵。然較比琴官起來，毫釐之間終覺稍遜。又想：
「琴官這個美貌，若不唱戲，天下人也不能瞻仰他，品題他，他也埋沒了，所以使其墮劫梨園，以顯造化遊戲鍾靈之意也未可知，故生了這個花王，又生得許多花相，如百花之輔牡丹。
但好花供人賞玩不過一季，而人之顏色可以十年。惟人勝於花，則愛人之心，自然比愛花更當勝些。誰想天下人的眼界，竟能相同。我意史竹君、王庸庵等必有言過其實之處，如今看來，真還刻劃不到，想必那些能詩能畫之說，也是的確無疑了。」便又想：「今日雖然見了琴官的戲，也未能稍通款曲，此後相逢，不知又在何日？但看他今日雙波頻注，似乎倒有繾纟卷之意。前此在車內掀簾凝望，又似非以陌上相逢看待，這也不知何故？」
便愈想愈不明白起來。想把前日所詠的《車中人》翻出看看，再添兩首，便取了出來。忽見三四兩首，挖去了兩個字，心甚詫異，即問小丫鬟道：「這兩日誰到這裡來看我的書？」小丫鬟道：「前日太太請客，有一班少奶奶，還有王家的二姑娘，都進來閒逛。那些少奶奶，將少爺的行樂圖看了半天，那二姑娘看少爺的書，其餘沒有人進來。我見二姑娘看書的時候，翻出一張紙來看了看、用指甲挖破一處，仍舊夾在書裡。」又笑道：「前日我聽得二姑娘雪兒說，孫家太太做媒，將二姑娘配了少爺了，將二姑娘配了少爺了，二姑娘還戴了太太一根簪子回去。」子玉似信不信的問道：「我不信，你敢是撒謊的？」小丫鬟道：「我敢撒謊？我那天看著房沒有敢走開，這是雪兒說的。只怕咱們家裡人，都也知道。」子玉聽了心內甚喜，猛想起這二表妹的容貌，也有些像琴官的模樣，便將他們比較起來，不知誰好。又把挖去的字一想，恍然大悟：「誰知竟犯了他的諱，無意之間天然湊合，這也奇極了。他看了，當我必是有心想念他，心裡定然怪我，這便怎樣？我又無從與他分辯，這竟是個不白之冤。」繼又想道：「既訂了姻，就怪我也不妨。」子玉復因瓊華兩個字，觸動琴官，一意纏綿，憐香慕色之心，從此而起。
到了初九日，劉文澤又著人來邀了。子玉告票萱堂，更衣乘輿而去。
且說文澤所請的容顏仲清、王恂、史南湘已經到了，隨後梅子玉、高品一同到門。家人引著走過大廳，到了花廳之旁垂花門進去，係石子砌成的一條甬道，兩邊都是太湖石疊成高高低低的假山，襯著參參差差的寒樹。遠遠望去，卻也有臺有亭，佈置得十分幽雅。轉了兩三個彎，過了一座石橋，甬路旁是一色的，都是綠竹，繞著一帶紅闌，迎面便是五間卷棚。顏仲清等都在廊下等候，劉文澤早已降階迎接。高品、子玉上前，先與主人見了禮，然後大家見了敘齒，史南湘、高品是二十五歲，高品二月生日，月分長於南湘。顏仲清二十四，王恂二十三，子玉十八。文澤雖二十四歲，卻是主人。大家依次入座，免不得敘幾句寒溫。內中惟子玉初次登堂，留心看時，只見正中懸著一塊楠木刻的藍字橫額，上面刻著「倚劍眠琴之室」兩旁楹帖是梳榔木的，刻著：茶煙乍起，鶴夢未醒，此中得少佳趣；松風徐來，山泉清聽，何處更著點塵。
署款是「道生屈本立書」，書法古拙異常。下面一張大案，案上羅列著許多書籍。旁邊擺著十二盆唐花，香氣襲人，令人心醉。子玉看了，又想起琴言那日作戲光景，真是寶光奪人，香氣沁骨，不覺有些模糊起來。忽聽文澤道：「這屋子太敞，我們裡面坐罷。」隨同到東邊，有書童揭起簾子，進去卻是三間書房，中間玻璃窗隔作兩層。從旁繞進，玻璃窗內又是兩間套房。朝南窗內，即看得見外面。上懸著董香光寫的「虛白」二宇，一幅倪雲林的枯木竹石，兩旁對聯是：名教中有樂地，風月外無多談。屋內正中間擺著一個漢白玉的長方盆，盆上刻著許多首詩，盆中滿滿的養著一盆水仙，此時花已半開。旁邊盆內一大株綠萼白梅，有五尺餘高，老幹著花，尚皆未放。向窗一面，才有一兩枝開的。
文澤因此屋中有地炕和暖，酒席即擺設在內。主人送了酒，大家坐下。
南湘道：「可惜今日沒有叫幾個人來。」文澤道：「我也打算叫的，因打聽他們今日都在怡園送九作消寒會，連堂會裡都沒有一個去的，所以沒有去叫，怕倒叫他們為難。南湘又道：
「今日我們可為軟紅塵中，一時雅集。」仲清坐在高品肩下，高品即湊著仲清耳邊輕輕的說了一句，仲清啞然失笑。眾人問仲清道：「他說什麼？」仲清向高品道：「我說罷。」高品搖了搖頭。仲清道：「那第七字對得尤妙。」說著兩人相視而笑。南湘最是性急，便道：「你們說了，我情願吃一杯。」高品道：「喝十杯再說。」文澤曉得南湘酒德平常，道：「我來講和，三杯罷。」高品笑：「竹君三杯，諸公各飲一杯，賞識這句話。」仲清道：「我是請教過的了，免飲。」高品笑道：「幾時？」仲清道：「真正你這張嘴，狗口裡生不出象牙來。」南湘道：「快拿酒來喝了，等他說。」真個喝了三杯，其餘也都喝了。高品笑向仲清道：「你是請教過的，你說罷。」仲清笑著罰了高品一杯酒，道：「他說『虛白室裡，三對雞巴。」眾人都不解。
文澤道：「這有何可笑？」南湘忽然想著，撫掌大笑道：「這促狹鬼，實在可惡，難為他實在對得敏捷。」子玉等悟著也都笑了，道：「雅字竟當他實字，真對得工穩。」文澤道：「卓兄，我出一對你對，卻不許思索。如對得好，我吃三杯。對不出，罰十杯。不好，罰五杯。」高品道：「從來說出對容易，對對難。對不出三杯，對不好一杯，如何？」南湘道：「也要看上對出得難不難，你且說來。」文澤向子玉道：「要借重大名，就是『子玉人如玉』。」仲清道：「這倒不容易呢。」一語未了，高品道：「我已對著了，你喝三杯。」文澤道：「你說。」南湘道：「如果對得好，我們還要公賀一杯。」高品笑道：「『卯金面是金』。何如？」王恂道：「卯金對於玉卻是絕對。」南湘道：「就是『面是金』欠典切些。」高品道：「典雖不典，切卻甚切。你沒有見過中秋節，攤子擺的兔兒爺臉上，都是金的麼？」說得哄堂大笑起來，文澤道：「你這刻薄鬼，連盟弟都罵起來了。」高品道：「箭在弦上，不得不發。」主人只得照數領了，合席也各飲了一杯。南湘道：「如此飲酒，罰來罰去，也覺無味。前日我們打了一天詩牌，卻極有趣。瑤卿打成兩首絕好的，可惜他們今日又在怡園。咱們何不再想一個新鮮酒令。」劉文澤道：「今日我們將那對詩的令，行一行罷。」子玉問道：「怎樣對詩？」仲清道：「這是極容易的，出令的把一句詩拆開了，一個個的說給人對，湊起來文義通的免飲，一字不連，罰一杯。往往鬧出笑話來，最有趣的。」高品道：「就是對詩。主人先飲令杯。」文澤飲畢，命人取了一塊楠板，順著衣衿開了姓，便道：「我先出對了。」寫了個「中」字。眾人想了一想：顏對了外，高對了後，梅對了上，史也對上，王對裡。文澤又出了一個「鳳」宇，顏對鴻，高對雞，梅對鸞，史對鴉，王對烏。文澤又出一個「下」字，南湘道：「有卷先交，我對『歸』字。」高品接著對「前」字，仲清、子玉同聲對「來」字，王恂對「回」字，文澤一一寫了。又道「扶」字，高搶對了「靠」字，史對了「送」字，顏對「寄」字，王對「馭」字，梅對「聽」字。
文澤道「雙」字，仲清對「孤」字，高品對「八」，子玉對「九」字，王恂道：「不好了，順著數兒就是十罷。」南湘道：「是了，我這個字倒有些難下，也罷，對『三』字罷。」文澤道「輦」宇。南湘道：「我曉得一定是這句詩。」子玉搶對了一個「琴」字，王恂對了「車」字，南湘對了「船」宇，只有高品未對。文澤催道：「再遲要罰酒了。」高品笑了一笑，道「舟」宇，令官重新寫起來，出的是「雙鳳雲中扶輦下」。仲清對的是「孤鴻天外寄書來」。大家贊好。高品對的是「八雞露後靠舟前」。大家一看忍不住都笑起來。文澤道：「這個實在不通得離奇了，沒有一個字連的，也有難倒他的時候。大家公議該喝幾杯？」南湘道：「就只舟前二字算連，其餘實在不貫，五杯是斷不能少的。」高品只管笑，也不辯，也不飲。主人道：「你到底怎樣？」高品隨湊著仲清耳邊說了一句話，把仲清笑得出了席，走到外間屋內放聲大笑，南湘不解，連忙出席來問仲清，仲清向他說了，那史南湘更拍著桌子狂笑。子玉等向高品問時，高品只是笑，說道：「你們且看完了大家的，再說不遲。」文澤道：「這罰酒是要喝的。」高品道：「自然。」仲清拉著南湘進來，文澤道：「不曉得他又在那裡搗些什麼鬼。」南湘、仲清聽了這句話，復又大笑，笑得眼淚直流。經小廝擰了手巾擦了，方才笑聲稍住。
再看子玉對的是「九駕天上聽琴來」。大家贊道：「這句真對得字字穩愜，又在劍潭之上。」於是公賀了一杯。南湘對的是「三鴉水上送船歸」。文澤道：「竹君此對，未免雜湊。」南湘道：「你這試官，少所見而多所怪，要挖眼睛了。這才對得工呢。」子玉道：「真對得好。」文澤道：「這個我倒要請教請教。」子玉道：「三鴉水上一歸人，是韓□的詩。」文澤恍然道：「可是《送襄垣王君歸別墅》的詩？我記性真壞極了，該打，該打！」南湘道：「幸虧你還記得娘家，不然總要罰十杯酒的。」再看王恂對的是「十烏日裡馭車回」。王恂道：「我的對壞了。」文繹道：「就是十烏二字不連。」高品道：「前舟又錯了，日中有烏，堯時十日並出，難道不是十烏麼？」文澤道：「這卻強詞奪理，到底勉強些。」於是公論推子玉第一、南湘第二、仲清第三、王恂第四、高品居末，就依名次輪作考官。
文澤道：「還有卓然的罰酒未飲，剛才到底說什麼，笑得這樣。如果實在說得好，免罰何妨。」南湘道：「若說了，非但不能免罰，還要倍罰。」文澤道：「莫非又是糟蹋我麼？」仲清道：「然也。」文澤道：「只要糟蹋得有理，罰酒也可以少減。」高品道：「想來五杯是不能免的。若要再加，萬萬來不得了，只好不說罷。」文澤道：「不加就是了。」高品道：「把我的對句，倒轉來念，你說好不好？」子玉同玉恂、文澤暗暗的念了一遍，都不覺鼓掌大笑起來，子玉笑得伏在桌上，王恂笑得靠著南湘，引得南湘、仲清又笑了一陣。
文澤道：「卓然將來死了，定坐拔舌地獄。」小廝斟了酒。高品道：「五杯一口氣喝，定要醉倒。還是與各人豁一拳，或者可以希冀。」隨順手一個個豁完，卻也有輸有贏。各飲畢，子玉作令官，一個個出了四字，是「費影收腸」。南湘對的是「驚聲放膽」，王恂是「融香浣乳」，文澤是「翻麼小舌」，仲清是「多仙散發」，獨高品對得別緻，是「除伊放糞」，大家看了已經發笑。子玉又出了一個「臺」字，南湘道：「這句好生。」沉吟了一會，對了「館」字，王恂對「屋」，文澤對「榭」，仲清對「島」，高品道：「我住在宏濟寺裡，就對『寺』。」子玉又出了一個「鸞」字，南湘道：「這字更奇。」王恂先搶了一個「燕」字，仲清對了「鶴」字，南湘道：「不好。搶不過你們，我偏不用飛禽一門，對『鼠』字罷。」文澤道：「難道是影鸞不成。我這『麼』字下，連個什麼字好，也罷，『麼』『鳥』二字是連的。」高品道：「你對『鳥』，我也對『鳥』。」子玉道：「『舞』字」。南湘道：「一定是『舞鸞』，只好對『射』字。」文澤搶對了「歌」字，王恂對了「華」字，仲清對了「瑤」字。高品道：「『巴』字好對麼？」眾人一齊笑道：「你只要肯吃酒，有什麼對不得？」子玉寫出來，出的是「舞臺收影費鸞腸」。南湘道：「哦，極眼前的詩句，都想不著了。」仲清道：「試官猶有所思乎？」子玉正寫著南湘的對子，笑了一笑，沒有答應。大家看南湘對的是「射館放聲驚鼠膽。」眾人道：「對得很好。」高品道：「他是想天鵝肉吃，不要嚇壞了。」南湘道：「擱著你這貧嘴，回來和你算帳。」再看王恂的是「華屋浣香融燕乳」。子玉已經連圈了。眾人道：「這句融洽得很。」共賀了一杯。文澤道：「我是落第了。」眾人看他對的是「歌館小麼含鳥舌」。南湘道：「也講得下去。」高品道：「歌館內有小麼是極連貫的，就是那小么兒太苦些。」南湘道：「為什麼？」高品道：「又是鳥，又是舌頭，分不清楚，那裡含得了這些。想來對對的人，是含慣的。」文澤道：「狗屁胡說，你的『糞』對諒來也不見得高。」仲清對的是「瑤島散仙多鶴髮」。子玉已經夾圈了，眾人同聲稱贊。南湘對王恂道：「只怕他搶了第一去了。」子玉道：「文如其人，這兩副對子，卻很配他們兩人。」高品道：「我的抹了罷，不必獻醜了。」南湘道：「我記得他的是『巴寺放伊除鳥糞』。該死，該死，不曉得放些什麼屁。」文澤道：「阿彌陀佛，你會挖苦人，也有今日，你且講講，有一個字連的麼？」子玉從新一看道：「兩兄且不要糟蹋他，卓兄此對，也有道理在內。」南湘看一看，點點頭道：「不差，這人實在壞極了。」文澤道：「難道還有點通氣麼？」南湘道：「可惡在不很不通。」高品只是笑著，一言不發。王恂走過仲清這邊來，問道：「那『巴寺』二字，出在那裡？」仲清道：「我記得戴叔倫詩有『望剎經巴寺』一句。」王恂道：「只要現成就可以。」文澤道：「下五字呢？」仲清道：「這裡有《傳燈錄》麼？」文澤令那識字的書童，從外間書架上取了書來。仲清翻出，只見上寫著：「崔相公入寺，見鳥雀於佛頭上放糞，乃問師曰：『鳥雀還有佛性也無？』師曰：『有。』崔云：『為什麼向佛頭上放糞？』師曰：『是伊為什麼不向鷂子頭上放？」仲清道：「據此看來，這句還說得過去。」文澤道：「究竟『放伊』兩字難解，『鳥』字若換了『雀』字就好了。」
高品道：「我的『鳥』與『雀』總是一樣，你的『鳥』字若換了『雀』字不好麼？」文澤想了一想，卻也有理。子玉就只取了仲清、王恂兩副對句，其餘文澤、高品罰了酒。
以下輪著南湘出令，出了一個「春」字，文澤對「夏」字，高品對「正」字。王恂道：「平對平使得麼？」眾人道：「使得，已經對過了。」王恂道「晨」字，仲清是「秋」字，子玉是「冬」字。南湘又出「月」字。高品道：「竹君的心思與眾不同，這兩字必定不連的，我對『陽』字。」王恂對「霜」，子玉對「雪」，仲清對「空」。文澤道：「管他連不連，我們只管對我們的。」對了「雲」字。南湘出了一個「三」字，高品道：「何如，不是三月。就是三春，我們都對『一』字，總連得上的。」俱各依允。就是文澤道：「我偏不和你一樣。對『半』字。」南湘又道「改」字，子玉道：「這字很奇，我對『敲』字。」文澤道：「我對『堆」字。」王恂是「豐」字，仲清是「盤」字，高品信口對了一個『伏』字，湘道：
「『兔』字。你們對罷。」王恂道：「『貉』字。」仲清道：「鷹能制兔，我對『鷹』字。」子玉道：「騎著驢子放鷹，想來是沒有的，且借他來對對，就是『驢』字。」文澤道：
「我『烏』字。」高品道：「我就是『龜』字。」文澤道：
「原來如此，失敬，失敬。」眾人嘩然大笑。南湘道：「這是你自畫供招，以後尊名竟改作高龜何如？」高品自知失口，縮不轉來，便道：「這兩字杜撰，不如轉贈吾兄。史龜二字，本是古人名，最典雅的。」文澤道：「你聽卓然這張嘴，自己落了便宜，又移到別人身上去了。」大家笑了一回，靜聽南湘出對。
南湘只管吃菜，總不出聲。文澤道：「你怎麼不出對了？」南湘笑道：「卷子已經交完了，還要題目麼？我是一順出的『春月三改兔』五字，內中前舟的『夏雲半堆烏』，『烏』字原也借對得好。然憑文取之，究不若劍潭的『秋空一盤鷹』渾脫，還該讓他第一。庾香的『冬雪一敲驢』，庸庵的『晨霜一豐貂』，都對得很工。最不好的是卓然的『正陽一伏龜』，這『正陽』二字如何加得上？」高品笑問文澤道：「貴處是那裡？」
文澤道：「你這狗頭，實在恨不死人，你還想翻供麼？」大家想想高品的話，又笑得了不得。原來文澤正是河南正陽縣人，剛剛合著這句對，你道巧不巧。文澤又灌了他一大杯酒，方出了氣。
以下仲清做令官，一個個字出的對是「絲髮白日如新」六字，高品屬的是「簽毛朱天入長」。子玉對的是「鏡顏華年對好。」南湘是「竹唇朱聲吹慢。」王恂是「剪衣烏時試拂」。文澤是「草麻黃朝起視」。仲清寫出上聯是「白髮如絲日日新」。
把文澤的「黃麻起草朝朝視」取了第一，子玉的「華顏對鏡年年好」取了第二，南湘的「朱唇吹竹聲聲慢」夾圈了，取了第三。大家都道：「這兩副對都好，似乎竹君的較勝。令官甲乙，似不甚公。」仲清道：「這兩本卷子都好，是不用說的。
面子上看去竹君的『竹』對『絲』，『朱唇』對『白髮』，工巧極矣，『聲聲慢』又暗藏曲牌名，似乎在庾香之上，我所以把他夾圈了。但上對即是一字字拆開，必得一字字恰對方好。
庾香以『年』對『日』最妥，竹君以『聲』對『日』，就不很對，假使『日』字不是疊用。或者竟是『白日』，那『朱聲』就講不去了，到底不及庾香的穩當，而且句子大方，不落纖巧，諸公以為然否？」幾句話說得眾人很服。南湘向來不肯讓人，此時亦甚首肯。高品道：「然則我以『天』對『日』，比庾香的更好，為什麼又不取我的呢？」仲清道：「等我寫出來，你講給我聽。」先寫王恂的是「烏衣試剪時時拂」。眾人道：「這句也自然得很。」仲清道：「這回考試，除了卓然，原是一榜盡賜及第的。」高品笑道：「留心眼睛，我這本卷子是打不得的。」仲清寫出看時，是「朱毛入笠天天長」。仲清用筆叉了幾叉，大家看了笑得不亦樂乎。南湘忍著笑道：「他這用的古典我曉得了。當初紅毛國王把大人國伐滅，占了他的江山。
那大人國中有座笠城，就是國王建都之所。紅毛國王進了這城，住了兩日覺得渾身腫脹，一天長似一天起來。想來用的這個古典了。」說著放聲大笑。王恂似信不信的問道：「後來呢？」
南湘笑道：「這古典甚長，只說夠他對的就是了。」文澤問道：「在什麼書上？」仲清道：「《史氏外編》。」王恂、文澤才明白過來，復又笑聲大作。高品道：「你們混說亂道，難道《四子書》都記不得？這就是《孟子》所說一毛不拔、追豚入笠之揚朱，所以謂之『朱毛入笠』。這才算得用古入化呢。」仲清道：「那『天天長』三字怎講？」高品道：「你這試官真是糊塗，他既是一毛不拔，自然天天長了。」眾人聽了，這一陣笑，若不是房屋深邃，只怕街上行路的也聽見。主人罰了高品三杯酒。
然後王恂作令官，出的是「香盡南人消國美。」文澤對的是」曲多東妓譜山名」。仲清對的是「賦難東士煉都學」。高品對的是「斗長西聖駕方齊」。
眾人留心高品對的，一個個都是平正通達的字。文澤道：
「此番卓然大概要取第一了，字字對得很穩。」子玉對的是「情深西旦感昆名」。南湘的是」圖多西士畫名園」。一一對畢，王恂寫出出句，是「香銷南國美人盡」。文澤對的是「曲譜東山名妓多。」仲清是「賦煉東都學士難」。高品是「斗駕西方齊聖長」。子玉是「情感西昆名旦深」。南湘是「圖畫西園名士多。」王恂道：「這第一不消說是竹君了。庾香『名旦』二字不典，不及劍潭的渾成，只怕第二是他。前舟次之。卓兄這句，我實在不懂，若有典故在內，不妨說明，不要批屈了你的。」
高品道：「我沒有見過主考閱文要請教士子。典故卻有，若告訴了你，只說我通關節中的了。」仲清道：「他這典故，出在東土大唐。」高品道：「劍潭是主考至親，倒應迴避，不許亂說。」原來王恂卻沒有看過《西遊記》，只管呆呆的看著粉板。南湘正在喝酒，忽見高品用手搭著涼篷。
向王恂一望，忍不住笑將出來，酒咽不及噴了出來，還咳嗽不已，引得合席都笑。南湘向王恂道：「等我笑完了，說《西遊記》給你聽。」文澤接著說道：「就是齊天大聖，送唐僧往西天取經的典故。」王恂恍然大悟道：「豈有此理，就是如此，那『斗駕』及『長』字總連不上。」南湘笑道：「你不曉得，孫行者駕起筋斗雲，就是十萬八千里，這路還不長麼？」
主人要罰高品的酒，高品再三央求，喝了一杯。
末了是高品出令。高品一口氣說了六個字，是「千里言召禾口」。仲清想道：「通共只有七個字，他一說就是六個，難道不怕人想著麼？必是用拆宇法來混人」。便道：「你這六個字可是『重詔和』三字麼？若不說明。我們就罷考了。」高品被他猜著，只得笑嘻嘻的點點頭。子玉對了『卓言貫』三字，南湘對了「品陽長」三字，王恂對了「一齡慶」三字，文澤對了「品奸動」三字，仲清對了「管毫定」三字。高品又一連出了四字是「九喜氣鳳」。
仲清道：「這倒不是拆字的，我就對『一高標兔』。」文澤道：「我就對『一歡心雞』。」王恂道：「我對『第長年龜』。」子玉對了『超元精人』，南湘對了「一精神龍。」高品背著人寫了上聯，擱著筆，把大眾的看了一回，鼻子裡笑了一笑，就用紙蘸著酒，把粉板上的字一齊擦了。眾人都詫異道：
「這又奇了，難道一卷都沒有好的麼？」南湘道：「不是，不是，如果不好，他必定寫出來把人取笑了。我想想他出的那幾個字，湊起來看是一句什麼。」仲清道：「他寫的時候，我瞧見起頭是『風詔』兩個字。」子玉想了想道：「莫非『鳳詔九重和喜氣』這句詩？」南湘道：「一點不錯。」高品道：「不是，不是。」仲清道：「我們且各自記出對句來，就明白了。」子玉道：「我的『人言超卓貫元精』這句卻不見好，也沒有什麼不通。」南湘道：「他是因他號卓然，這『卓貴元精』，因他受不住的原故。」仲清道：「我的是『兔毫一管定高標』，必定因『兔高』二字，犯了他的諱。」王恂道：「我記得是龜齡第一慶長年。」南湘道：「好對，好對，第一定了，這又為什麼？」文澤道：「你不見他巍然首座麼。」南湘點點頭，道：「我的對更明明指著他了。」眾人問是為什麼？南湘道：「龍陽一品長精神。」文澤道：「我的更說穿了，是『雞奸一品動歡心。』這也奇怪，為什麼牽名道姓，都罵起他來？」南湘道：「這也是天理昭彰，嘴頭刻薄的報應。」高品道：「你們瞎猜些什麼，我的上對並不是這樣，因為你們對的都不通，不出你們的醜就罷了，難道一定要獻醜麼？」眾人道：「我們下場的人，是不怕醜的，只管說。」高品手指著鐘上道：「你們看什麼時候了，還不吃飯麼？」眾人看時，已是亥正二刻多了。文澤道：「到底是不是？你說了我們吃飯。」高品道：「就算是的，我落點便宜何如？」於是大家吃飯，洗漱畢，因夜色已深，告辭出來。
子玉一面走著，向主人道：「這園子點綴得很幽雅。」文澤道：「這算什麼園子，不及徐度香怡園十分之一，幾時我同你去逛逛。」這裡賓主二人講著，那高品對仲清道：「你可曉得京裡又來了一個精品麼？」仲清笑道：「想是高品的弟兄。」高品道：「這人卻也可以做得我的弟兄，聞他也是南京人，現寓在寵濟寺內，卻沒有與他往來。看他人甚風雅，而光景很闊。你可曉得是什麼人？」仲清道：「這又奇了，你們同在廟裡倒不認得，來問我。」說著已到門口，各人上車分路而回。此一番諸名士雅集，卻有兩個俗子苦中作樂，要窮有趣，卻討沒趣的事。
且聽下回分解。
“The story tells of Zi Yu, who, after returning from the guild hall, spent two days pondering the play performed by Qin Guan, considering it the epitome of beauty that surpasses all else in the world. He also reviewed the artistic qualities and performances of Su Huifang, Lu Sulan, Jin Shufang, and Li Yulin, all of whom he regarded as outstanding. Upon closer examination, he found Su Huifang’s expressions to be the most superior, followed closely by Lu Sulan. However, compared to Qin Guan, he felt there was a slight deficiency, albeit a minute one.
Zi Yu thought to himself, ‘If Qin Guan’s beauty were not showcased in opera, the world would not be able to admire and critique him, and his talent would be buried. Perhaps he was destined to fall into the opera to display the playful essence of creation. Thus, this King of Flowers was born, adorned with numerous floral graces, like the peony among hundreds of flowers.
But the best flowers are enjoyed only for a season, while human beauty can last for a decade. Surely, people are superior to flowers, and thus, the affection for them should naturally be greater. It is curious that everyone seems to agree on this. I think historians like Shi Zhu Jun and Wang Yong An must have exaggerated in their accounts. Now it appears they weren’t entirely accurate, and their claims of being skilled in poetry and painting must indeed be beyond doubt.’ He then thought further, ‘Even though I have seen Qin Guan’s performance today, I wasn’t able to fully grasp the subtleties of his art. When will I see him again? But watching his intense expressions today, it seems he might harbor a deep interest. Previously, when he peered through the curtain in the carriage, he didn’t treat it as a casual encounter on the road, which makes me wonder why?’
The more he thought about it, the more puzzled he became. He decided to revisit the poems he wrote the other day titled ‘The Man in the Carriage’ and considered adding a couple more verses. Suddenly, he noticed that two words were removed from his poem, which greatly surprised him. He asked his maid, ‘Who has been here to see my book these past few days?’ The maid replied, ‘The day before yesterday, your mother hosted guests, including several young ladies and Miss Wang from the Wang family, who all came to look around. The young ladies admired your amusement painting for a long time, and Miss Wang read your book. When she was reading, she took out a piece of paper, looked at it, scratched something off with her fingernail, and then placed it back in the book.’ She laughed and added, ‘Miss Wang’s maid, Xue Er, mentioned that Mrs. Sun was matchmaking, and it seems Miss Wang is now engaged to you, Sir. She even took home a hairpin from your mother.’ Zi Yu asked in disbelief, ‘I don’t believe it. Are you lying?’ The maid responded, ‘Why would I lie? I was there the whole day and saw everything. Everyone at home knows about it.’ Zi Yu felt a mix of emotions upon hearing this and suddenly remembered that Miss Wang somewhat resembled Qin Guan. He began to compare them but couldn’t decide who was more appealing. Then, recalling the missing words, he had a sudden realization: ‘It seems I inadvertently violated her taboo. It was a natural mistake, but now she might think I harbor feelings for her and blame me. How do I explain this misunderstanding?’ He then resignedly thought, ‘Now that we’re engaged, even if she blames me, it doesn’t matter much.’ Zi Yu’s thoughts were thus preoccupied with Qin Guan and the emotional attachment grew from there.
On the ninth day, Liu Wenzhe sent someone to invite him again. Zi Yu informed his family at the Xuan Tang and changed clothes to go out.
Meanwhile, the guests Wenzhe had invited, including Yan Zhongqing, Wang Xun, and Shi Nanxiang, had already arrived. Following them, Mei Ziyu and Gao Pin entered together. The servant led them through the main hall to a flower hall beside the draping floral gate. The path was paved with pebbles and flanked by artificial mountains made of Taihu stones, interspersed with sparse winter trees. From a distance, the layout included platforms and pavilions, arranged with exquisite taste. After several turns and crossing a stone bridge, the path bordered by green bamboo led to a red railing, facing five interconnected pavilions. Yan Zhongqing and others were waiting under the porch, and Liu Wenzhe had already come down the steps to greet them. Gao Pin and Zi Yu stepped forward to greet the host first, then exchanged greetings with the others. Shi Nanxiang and Gao Pin were both twenty-five, with Gao being older by two months. Yan Zhongqing was twenty-four, Wang Xun twenty-three, and Zi Yu eighteen. Although Wenzhe was also twenty-four, he was the host. Everyone took their seats in order, and it was customary to exchange a few words about the weather. Zi Yu, attending for the first time, paid attention and noticed a nanmu carved plaque with blue characters in the center that read ‘Room of the Resting Sword and Sleeping Qin.’ The posts on either side were made of palm wood, carved with the words: ‘As the tea smoke rises, the crane dreams are yet to wake. Here lies subtle delight; as the pine breeze arrives slowly, the mountain spring sounds clear, where else could dust be settled?’ The signature read ‘Written by Dao Sheng from his own hands,’ and the calligraphy was uniquely ancient. Below it, a large desk displayed numerous books. To the side, twelve pots of Tang flowers emitted a fragrance that was intoxicating. Zi Yu, reminded of Qin Yan’s performance that day, felt overwhelmed by the brilliance and the fragrance that seemed to penetrate to the bone, and he became somewhat dazed. He heard Wenzhe say, ‘This room is too spacious, let’s sit inside.’ They followed him to the east side where a page lifted the curtain to enter. Inside, three rooms formed a study, with a double-layered glass window in the center. They passed beside it to enter another set of rooms behind the glass. From the south-facing window, one could see outside. Hanging there was a ‘Void and White’ plaque written by Dong Xiangguang and a painting of withered trees and bamboo stones by Ni Yunlin. The couplets on either side read: ‘Within the teachings, a joyful place exists; beyond the moonlight, little is discussed. Inside the room, a long white jade planter was engraved with numerous poems, filled with blooming daffodils. Next to it, a large pot held a green-stemmed white plum over five feet tall, with old stems flowering, though not yet bloomed. Near the window, only one or two branches had blossomed.
In this room, heated by a ground stove, the wine banquet was set up. The host served the wine, and everyone sat down.
Nanxiang remarked, ‘It’s a pity we didn’t invite a few more people today.’ Wenzhe replied, ‘I planned to, but I heard they were all at Yi Garden for a cold-weather gathering, and no one from the hall was available, so I didn’t bother calling them, to avoid making it difficult for them.’ Nanxiang added:
‘Today, we might as well be in a refined gathering amidst the mundane world.’ Zhongqing sat below Gao, and Gao whispered something in Zhongqing’s ear, making him laugh silently. The others asked Zhongqing, ‘What did he say?’ Zhongqing replied to Gao, ‘I’ll say it.’ Gao shook his head. Zhongqing said, ‘The seventh character matches wonderfully.’ As they looked at each other and laughed, Nanxiang, being impatient by nature, said, ‘If you tell us, I’m willing to drink a cup.’ Gao said, ‘Say after ten cups.’ Wenzhe, knowing Nanxiang’s usual limit with alcohol, said, ‘Let’s make peace with three cups.’ Gao laughed, ‘Three cups for Zhu Jun, one cup each for everyone else to appreciate this phrase.’ Zhongqing said, ‘I’ve been taught already, no need to drink.’ Gao laughed, ‘When?’ Zhongqing replied, ‘Really, you can’t expect ivory to come out of a dog’s mouth.’ Nanxiang said, ‘Hurry up and drink, wait for him to speak.’ They really did drink three cups, and the rest also drank. Gao laughed and told Zhongqing, ‘You’ve been taught, now you say it.’ Zhongqing, still smiling, fined Gao a cup of wine and said, ‘He said “In the room of void and white, three pairs of dicks.”‘ Everyone was puzzled.
Wenzhe asked, ‘What’s so funny about that?’ Nanxiang suddenly realized, clapped his hands and laughed loudly, ‘This vulgar ghost, truly despicable, but he matched it cleverly.’ Zi Yu and the others caught on and laughed as well, saying, ‘The elegant word actually meant the literal one, truly a stable match.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Zhuo brother, I challenge you with a pair, and you can’t think it over. If your response is good, I’ll drink three cups. If you can’t match, you drink ten cups. If it’s bad, you drink five cups.’ Gao said, ‘It’s always easy to say a match, but hard to match a match. If I can’t match, three cups; if it’s bad, one cup, how about that?’ Nanxiang said, ‘It also depends on how difficult the upper match is, you just say it.’ Wenzhe turned to Zi Yu and said, ‘If I need to borrow a big name, it’s “Zi Yu’s character is like jade.”‘ Zhongqing said, ‘This is not easy.’ Before he finished, Gao said, ‘I’ve already matched it, you drink three cups.’ Wenzhe said, ‘You say it.’ Nanxiang said, ‘If it’s good, we still need to toast one cup.’ Gao laughed, ‘“The face of the hare is golden.” How about that?’ Wang Xun said, ‘Hare matches jade absolutely.’ Nanxiang said, ‘It’s just that “face is golden” lacks a bit of propriety.’ Gao said, ‘Although it’s not classic, the match is very apt. Haven’t you seen the faces of Rabbit God figurines on Mid-Autumn Festival stalls, all golden?’ This made everyone laugh uproariously, and Wenzhe said, ‘You mean ghost, even mocking your fellow brothers.’ Gao said, ‘Once the arrow is on the string, it must be released.’ The host had no choice but to accept the count, and everyone at the table drank a cup. Nanxiang said, ‘Drinking like this, punishing back and forth, feels tasteless. The other day, we played poetry cards all day, which was very interesting. Yaoqing made two excellent verses, it’s a pity they were at Yi Garden today. Why don’t we think of a new wine order?’ Wenzhe said, ‘Today, let’s go with that poetry order.’ Zi Yu asked, ‘How to match poems?’ Zhongqing said, ‘It’s very easy, the one giving the order breaks down a line of poetry, and tells each character for others to match. If they can form a verse that makes sense, they don’t drink; if a single character doesn’t connect, they drink a cup. It often causes laughter, the most interesting part.’ Gao said, ‘Start with the host drinking the order cup.’ Wenzhe drank, then someone brought a piece of nanmu, and he began with his surname, saying, ‘I’ll start the match.’ He wrote the character ‘中’ (middle). Everyone thought for a while: Yan matched with ‘外’ (outside), Gao with ‘後’ (back), Mei with ‘上’ (above), Shi also with ‘上’ (above), Wang with ‘裡’ (inside). Wenzhe then wrote the character ‘鳳’ (phoenix), Yan matched with ‘鴻’ (swan), Gao with ‘雞’ (chicken), Mei with ‘鸞’ (mythical bird), Shi with ‘鴉’ (crow), Wang with ‘烏’ (raven). Wenzhe wrote the character ‘下’ (down), Nanxiang said, ‘I have the word first, I match with “歸” (return).’ Gao followed with ‘前’ (before), Zhongqing and Zi Yu both said ‘來’ (come), Wang Xun with ‘回’ (turn), Wenzhe wrote them all down. Then he wrote ‘扶’ (support), Gao quickly matched with ‘靠’ (lean), Shi with ‘送’ (send), Yan with ‘寄’ (mail), Wang with ‘馭’ (drive), Mei with ‘聽’ (listen).
Wenzhe wrote ‘雙’ (double), Zhongqing matched with ‘孤’ (lonely), Gao with ‘八’ (eight), Zi Yu with ‘九’ (nine), Wang Xun said, ‘Not good, just count to ten.’ Nanxiang said, ‘Alright, this word is a bit difficult to match, let’s go with “三” (three).’ Wenzhe wrote ‘輦’ (chariot). Nanxiang said, ‘I knew it was this poem.’ Zi Yu quickly matched with ‘琴’ (qin), Wang Xun with ‘車’ (car), Nanxiang with ‘船’ (boat), only Gao hadn’t matched. Wenzhe urged, ‘Delay and you’ll be fined.’ Gao laughed and said ‘舟’ (boat), the officer rewrote it, and it was ‘雙鳳雲中扶輦下’ (Two phoenixes in the clouds support the chariot below). Zhongqing’s match was ‘孤鴻天外寄書來’ (The lonely swan sends a letter from beyond the heavens). Everyone praised it. Gao’s match was ‘八雞露後靠舟前’
(Eight chickens after the dew lean against the boat in front). Everyone saw it and couldn’t help but laugh. Wenzhe said, ‘This is truly an odd match, not a single word connects, but it stumped him this time. Let’s discuss how many cups he should drink?’ Nanxiang said, ‘Only the words ‘boat front’ can count as connected, the rest really don’t connect, five cups are definitely not less.’ Gao just laughed, neither argued nor drank. The host said, ‘What’s your final word?’ Gao whispered something to Zhongqing, which made him laugh so hard he left the seat and went into another room, laughing loudly. Nanxiang, puzzled, quickly left his seat to ask Zhongqing, who told him, causing Shi Nanxiang to slap the table and laugh wildly. Zi Yu and the others asked Gao at the time, but Gao just laughed, saying, ‘Let’s finish everyone’s first, then it’s not too late to say.’ Wenzhe said, ‘This penalty wine must be drunk.’ Gao said, ‘Naturally.’ Zhongqing pulled Nanxiang back in, and Wenzhe said, ‘I don’t know what kind of ghost he’s conjuring up again.’ Nanxiang and Zhongqing, having heard this, laughed again, tears streaming down. After the servant wrung out a handkerchief and wiped it off, the laughter finally subsided.
Then we see Zi Yu’s match was ‘九駕天上聽琴來’ (Nine rides in the heavens listening to the qin). Everyone praised, ‘This verse is truly well matched, word by word satisfying, and above Jian Lake.’ They congratulated him with a cup. Nanxiang’s match was ‘三鴉水上送船歸’ (Three crows over the water send the boat back). Wenzhe said, ‘Zhu Jun, this match, seems rather forced.’ Nanxiang said, ‘You, this examiner, see little and wonder much, you want to gouge out eyes. This is actually well matched.’ Zi Yu said, ‘Truly a good match.’ Wenzhe said, ‘This I really need to consult.’ Zi Yu said, ‘Three crows over the water, one person returns, is a poem by Han □.’ Wenzhe suddenly said, ‘Is it the poem ‘Sending Off Lord Wang of Xiangyuan to His Villa’? I really have a bad memory, should be beaten, should be beaten!’ Nanxiang said, ‘Lucky you still remember your mother’s home, otherwise you’d definitely have to drink ten cups of wine.’ Let’s see Wang Xun’s match ‘十烏日裡馭車回’ (Ten ravens in the day drive the car back). Wang Xun said, ‘My match is bad.’ Wenzhe said, ‘It’s just that the words ‘ten ravens’ don’t connect.’ Gao said, ‘The boat front is wrong again, there are ravens in the day, didn’t ten suns come out during the time of Yao, isn’t that ten ravens?’ Wenzhe said, ‘This is really arguing a point, at the end it’s a bit forced.’ Thus, the consensus ranked Zi Yu first, Nanxiang second, Zhongqing third, Wang Xun fourth, Gao last, and according to the rankings, they took turns as examiners.
Wenzhe said, ‘There’s still Zhuo’s un-drunk penalty wine, what exactly did he say to make him laugh like that? If it really was well said, why not exempt the penalty?’ Nanxiang said, ‘If he says it, not only can’t he be exempted, he’ll have to be doubly penalized.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Could it be another slander against me?’ Zhongqing said, ‘Indeed so.’ Wenzhe said, ‘As long as the slander is reasonable, the penalty wine can be somewhat reduced.’ Gao said, ‘I think five cups can’t be avoided. If you want to add more, it’s absolutely impossible, just don’t say it.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Then don’t add.’ Gao said, ‘Reverse my matching sentence and read it, what do you think?’ Zi Yu, Wang Xun, and Wenzhe secretly read it once, and couldn’t help but clap and laugh. Zi Yu laughed so hard he leaned on the table, Wang Xun laughed leaning on Nanxiang, which caused Nanxiang and Zhongqing to laugh again.
Wenzhe said, ‘Zhuo, when you die, you will definitely sit in the hell of tongue-pulling.’ The servant poured the wine. Gao said, ‘Drink five cups in one breath, definitely going to get drunk. It’s better to bet with everyone, maybe there’s a chance.’ Following, he bet one by one, and there were both losses and wins. After everyone drank, Zi Yu became the order officer, and everyone matched four characters, ‘費影收腸’ (Cost shadow collect intestines). Nanxiang matched ‘驚聲放膽’ (Startling sound embolden), Wang Xun ‘融香浣乳’ (Melt fragrance wash milk), Wenzhe ‘翻麼小舌’ (Flip what small tongue), Zhongqing ‘多仙散發’ (Many immortals disperse hair), only Gao matched distinctively, ‘除伊放糞’ (Remove her, let go of feces), everyone saw and already started laughing. Zi Yu then gave a ‘臺’ (platform) character, Nanxiang said, ‘This sentence is very well put.’ After pondering for a while, he matched with ‘館’ (hall), Wang Xun with ‘屋’ (house), Wenzhe with ‘榭’ (pavilion), Zhongqing with ‘島’ (island), Gao said, ‘I live in Hongji Temple, just match with “寺” (temple).’ Zi Yu then gave a ‘鸞’ (mythical bird) character, Nanxiang said, ‘This character is even more peculiar.’ Wang Xun first grabbed a ‘燕’ (swallow) character, Zhongqing matched with ‘鶴’ (crane), Nanxiang said, ‘Not good. I can’t compete with you guys, I stubbornly won’t use the category of flying birds, match with “鼠” (rat) instead.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Could it be shadowing the luan? My ‘麼’ (what) character next, what character connects well, anyway, ‘麼’ (what) ‘鳥’ (bird) two characters are connected.’ Gao said, ‘You match with “鳥” (bird), I also match with “鳥” (bird).’ Zi Yu said, ‘舞’ (dance)’ character.’ Nanxiang said, ‘It must be “舞鸞” (dance luan), only good to match with “射” (shoot)’ character.’ Wenzhe quickly matched with ‘歌’ (song)’ character, Wang Xun with ‘華’ (splendor)’ character, Zhongqing with ‘瑤’ (jade)’ character. Gao said, ‘Is “巴” (ba) character good to match?’ Everyone laughed together, ‘As long as you’re willing to drink, what can’t you match?’ Zi Yu wrote it out, it was ‘舞臺收影費鸞腸’ (Dance platform collect shadow cost luan intestines). Nanxiang said, ‘Oh, extremely current verse, all unimaginable.’ Zhongqing said, ‘The examiner still has thoughts?’ Zi Yu was writing Nanxiang’s matches, laughed a little, didn’t respond. Everyone saw Nanxiang’s match was ‘射館放聲驚鼠膽’ (Shoot hall release voice startle rat gall). Everyone said, ‘Matched very well.’ Gao said, ‘He’s thinking of swan meat to eat, don’t scare it bad.’ Nanxiang said, ‘Leave your poor mouth, I’ll settle accounts with you later.’ Let’s see Wang Xun’s ‘華屋浣香融燕乳’ (Splendid house wash fragrance melt swallow milk). Zi Yu had already linked them. Everyone said, ‘This sentence matches very harmoniously.’ They congratulated with a cup. Wenzhe said, ‘I am the last.’ Everyone saw his match was ‘歌館小麼含鳥舌’ (Song hall small what contain bird tongue). Nanxiang said, ‘It can also be spoken.’ Gao said, ‘There’s a small what in the song hall, it’s very connected, it’s just that little what is too bitter.’ Nanxiang said, ‘Why?’ Gao said, ‘Both birds and tongues, can’t distinguish clearly, where can these be contained? It seems the matching person is used to containing.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Nonsense, your “feces” match probably isn’t high either.’ Zhongqing’s match was ‘瑤島散仙多鶴髮’ (Jade island scattered immortals many crane hairs). Zi Yu had already linked them, everyone unanimously praised. Nanxiang said to Wang Xun, ‘I’m afraid he snatched first place.’ Zi Yu said, ‘Character like the person, these two pairs of matches, really suit them both.’ Gao said, ‘Scrap mine, no need to embarrass myself.’ Nanxiang said, ‘I remember his was “巴寺放伊除鳥糞” (Ba temple let her remove bird feces). Damn it, damn it, don’t know what kind of fart he let out.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Amitabha, you can mock people, and you have today, just talk, is there a single word connected?’ Zi Yu took a new look and said, ‘You two don’t slander him, Zhuo’s match also has reason inside.’ Nanxiang looked and nodded, ‘Not bad, this person is really bad.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Is there still a bit of sense?’ Nanxiang said, ‘It’s hateful but not very disconnected.’ Gao just smiled, not saying a word. Wang Xun walked over to Zhongqing’s side and asked, ‘Where did those “Ba temple” two words come out?’ Zhongqing said, ‘I remember Dai Shulun’s poem has “Looking at the temple through Ba temple” one sentence.’ Wang Xun said, ‘As long as it’s existing, it’s fine.’ Wenzhe said, ‘What about the next five words?’ Zhongqing said, ‘Is there a ‘Chuan Deng Lu’ here?’ Wenzhe ordered the literate page to take a book from the outside bookshelf. Zhongqing flipped through, only to see it written: ‘Cui Xianggong entered the temple, saw birds and sparrows defecating on Buddha’s head, then asked the master: “Do birds and sparrows also have Buddha-nature?” The master said: “Yes.” Cui said: “Why do they defecate on Buddha’s head?” The master said: “Why don’t they defecate on the eagle’s head?”’ Zhongqing said, ‘According to this, this sentence can still be spoken.’ Wenzhe said, ‘Ultimately “let her” two words are hard to explain, if the “bird” word was changed to “sparrow” it would be good.’
Gao said, ‘My “bird” and “sparrow” are the same, if your “bird” word was changed to “sparrow” wouldn’t it be good?’ Wenzhe thought for a while, it also made sense. Zi Yu just took Zhongqing and Wang Xun’s two pairs of matches, the rest Wenzhe and Gao were fined wine.
Next, it was Nanxiang’s turn to give the order, he gave a ‘春’ (spring) character, Wenzhe matched with ‘夏’ (summer), Gao with ‘正’ (correct). Wang Xun said, ‘Does plain match plain work?’ Everyone said, ‘It works, it’s already been matched.’ Wang Xun gave ‘晨’ (morning), Zhongqing was ‘秋’ (autumn), Zi Yu was ‘冬’ (winter). Nanxiang then gave ‘月’ (moon). Gao said, ‘Zhu Jun’s thoughts are unlike others, these two characters must not be connected, I match with “陽” (sun).’ Wang Xun matched ‘霜’ (frost), Zi Yu matched ‘雪’ (snow), Zhongqing matched ‘空’ (empty). Wenzhe said, ‘No matter if they connect or not, we just match ours.’ Matched with ‘雲’ (cloud). Nanxiang gave a ‘三’ (three) character, Gao said, ‘How about, if not March. It’s three springs, we all match with “一” (one), always connecting.’ Everyone agreed. It’s just Wenzhe said, ‘I won’t be the same as you. Match with “半” (half).’ Nanxiang then gave ‘改’ (change) character, Zi Yu said, ‘This character is very peculiar, I match with “敲” (knock).’ Wenzhe said, ‘I match with “堆” (pile).’ Wang Xun was ‘豐’ (abundant), Zhongqing was ‘盤’ (plate), Gao casually matched with “伏” (lie down) character, Nanxiang said:
‘ “兔” (rabbit) character. You guys match.’ Wang Xun said, ‘ “貉” (raccoon dog).’ Zhongqing said, ‘Eagles can control rabbits, I match with “鷹” (eagle).’ Zi Yu said, ‘Riding a donkey releasing eagles, seems there isn’t, just borrow it to match, it’s “驢” (donkey).’ Wenzhe said:
‘ I “烏” (black).’ Gao said, ‘I’m just “龜” (turtle).’ Wenzhe said:
‘ So it is, my apologies, my apologies.’ Everyone burst into laughter. Nanxiang said, ‘This is your self-drawn confession, from now on your respected name should be changed to Gao Gui, how about that?’ Gao, knowing he slipped, couldn’t retract it, and said, ‘These two characters are made up, better transferred to my brother. Shi Gui two characters, originally an ancient name, most elegant.’ Wenzhe said, ‘You hear Zhuo’s mouth, he got a bargain, and moved it onto someone else.’ Everyone laughed for a while, quietly listening to Nanxiang give the match.
Nanxiang just kept eating, not speaking. Wenzhe said, ‘Why aren’t you giving matches?’ Nanxiang laughed and said, ‘The exam papers are already handed in, still need topics? I gave out in one go “春月三改兔” (Spring moon three changes rabbit) five characters, among them the front boat’s “夏雲半堆烏” (Summer cloud half pile black), “烏” (black) character was originally also a good match. But taking it from the text, it ultimately isn’t as complete as Jian Lake’s “秋空一盤鷹” (Autumn sky a plate eagle), still should let him be first. Yu Xiang’s “冬雪一敲驢” (Winter snow one knock donkey), Yong An’s “晨霜一豐貂” (Morning frost one abundant marten), all matched very well. The worst is Zhuo’s “正陽一伏龜” (Correct sun one lie turtle), these “correct sun” two words how can they be added?’ Gao laughed and asked Wenzhe, ‘Where is your place?’
Wenzhe said, ‘You this dog head, really hate not killing people, you still want to recant?’ Everyone thought about Gao’s words, and laughed uncontrollably. It turns out Wenzhe was really from Zhengyang County in Henan, just matching this sentence, you say isn’t it coincidental? Wenzhe then poured him a big cup of wine, finally venting his anger.
Below, Zhongqing became the order officer, everyone matched ‘絲髮白日如新’ (Silk hair white day like new) six characters, Gao belonged to ‘簽毛朱天入長’ (Sign hair red sky enter long). Zi Yu matched ‘鏡顏華年對好’ (Mirror face splendid year opposite good). Nanxiang was ‘竹唇朱聲吹慢’ (Bamboo lips red sound blow slow). Wang Xun was ‘剪衣烏時試拂’ (Cut clothes black time try brush). Wenzhe was ‘草麻黃朝起視’ (Grass hemp yellow morning rise view). Zhongqing wrote out the upper match was ‘白髮如絲日日新’ (White hair like silk day by day new).
He took Wenzhe’s ‘黃麻起草朝朝視’ (Yellow hemp rise grass morning morning view) as the first, Zi Yu’s ‘華顏對鏡年年好’ (Splendid face opposite mirror year year good) took second, Nanxiang’s ‘朱唇吹竹聲聲慢’ (Red lips blow bamboo sound sound slow) was linked, took third. Everyone said, ‘These two pairs of matches are good, it seems Zhu Jun’s is better. Order officer first and second, seems not very fair.’ Zhongqing said, ‘These two volumes are good, it’s needless to say.
On the surface, Zhu Jun’s “bamboo” matches “silk,” “red lips” matches “white hair,” extremely skillful, “sound sound slow” also contains a hidden tune name, seems to be above Yu Xiang, that’s why I linked him. But the upper match is exactly one word by one word split open, must be exactly one word by one word just right.
Yu Xiang with “year” matches “day” is most appropriate, Zhu Jun with “sound” matches “day,” just doesn’t match, suppose “day” word isn’t repeated. Or if it’s really “white day,” then “red sound” can’t be spoken, ultimately not as steady as Yu Xiang’s, and the sentence is straightforward, not falling into fineness, do you gentlemen agree?’
A few words convinced everyone very much. Nanxiang always reluctant to let people, this time also very much nodded. Gao said, ‘Then I with “sky” match “day,” better than Yu Xiang’s, why not take mine?’ Zhongqing said, ‘Wait till I write it out, you explain to me.’ First wrote Wang Xun’s ‘烏衣試剪時時拂’ (Black clothes try cut time time brush). Everyone said, ‘This sentence is also very natural.’ Zhongqing said, ‘This exam, except for Zhuo, originally is a list all awarded the degree.’ Gao laughed, ‘Keep an eye out, my this volume can’t be beaten.’ Zhongqing wrote out and saw, it was ‘朱毛入笠天天長’ (Red hair enter hat sky sky long). Zhongqing crossed it a few times with a pen, everyone saw and laughed immensely. Nanxiang held back laughter and said, ‘I understand his use of classics now. Initially, when the Red-haired King conquered the Adults’ Country and occupied their territory, the Adults’ Country had a Hat City, which is where the king established the capital. The Red-haired King entered this city, stayed for two days and felt his body swelling, one day seemed longer than the next. It seems he used this classic.’ Saying this, he burst out laughing. Wang Xun half-believed and asked, ‘What happened next?’
Nanxiang laughed and said, ‘This classic is very long, just saying enough for his match is enough.’ Wenzhe asked, ‘In what book?’ Zhongqing said, ‘《Shi’s External Compilation》.’ Wang Xun and Wenzhe finally understood, and laughter broke out again. Gao said, ‘You guys mix up nonsense, can’t even remember the Four Books? This is what Mencius said about one hair not plucked, pursuing pigs into hats, thus called “red hair enters hats.” This counts as using ancient into transformation.’ Zhongqing said, ‘How do you explain those “sky sky long” three words?’ Gao said, ‘You this examiner really is confused, since he’s one hair not plucked, naturally sky sky long.’ Everyone heard, this round of laughter, if not for the deep house, perhaps even the street walkers would have heard. The host fined Gao three cups of wine.
Then Wang Xun became the order officer, the match was ‘香盡南人消國美’ (Fragrance exhausted southern people disappear country beautiful). Wenzhe matched ‘曲多東妓譜山名’ (Tune many eastern courtesans record mountain name). Zhongqing matched ‘賦難東士煉都學’ (Composition difficult eastern gentleman refine capital study). Gao matched ‘斗長西聖駕方齊’ (Fight long western saint drive direction complete).
Everyone paid attention to Gao’s match, each one was even and comprehensible. Wenzhe said:
‘This time Zhuo probably takes first, each character matches very stable.’ Zi Yu matched ‘情深西旦感昆名’ (Feeling deep western dawn感昆名).’ Nanxiang’s was ‘圖多西士畫名園’ (Plan many western gentlemen paint famous garden).’ One by one matched, Wang Xun wrote out the phrase, it was ‘香銷南國美人盡’ (Fragrance sells southern country beautiful people exhausted).’ Wenzhe matched ‘曲譜東山名妓多’ (Tune record eastern mountain famous courtesans many).’ Zhongqing was ‘賦煉東都學士難’ (Composition refine eastern capital scholars difficult).’ Gao was ‘斗駕西方齊聖長’ (Fight drive western direction complete saint long).’ Zi Yu was ‘情感西昆名旦深’ (Feeling感西昆名旦深).’ Nanxiang was ‘圖畫西園名士多’ (Plan paint western garden famous gentlemen many).’ Wang Xun said, ‘This first place doesn’t need to be said, it’s Zhu Jun’s. Yu Xiang “名旦” (famous dawn) two words not classic, not as complete as Jian Lake, probably second is him. Front boat next. Zhuo’s this sentence, I really don’t understand, if there’s a classic inside, feel free to explain, don’t wrongly criticize you.’
Gao said, ‘I haven’t seen the chief examiner asking scholars for advice. There is a classic, if I told you, only saying I’m familiar with the middle of the festival.’ Zh
ongqing said, ‘His classic, from the Eastern Great Tang.’ Gao said, ‘Jian Lake is the chief examiner’s close relative, should avoid, not allowed to talk nonsense.’ It turns out Wang Xun hadn’t seen Journey to the West, just kept staring blankly at the powder board. Nanxiang was drinking wine, suddenly saw Gao with his hand over the canopy.
Looking at Wang Xun, couldn’t help but laugh out, the wine not swallowed sprayed out, still coughing endlessly, causing everyone at the table to laugh. Nanxiang said to Wang Xun, ‘Wait till I finish laughing, I’ll tell you Journey to the West.’ Wenzhe followed up saying, ‘It’s the Great Sage Equal to Heaven, the classic of Sun Wukong escorting Tang Monk to the Western Heavens to fetch scriptures.’ Wang Xun suddenly realized and said, ‘How could it be so, just like this, then “fight drive” and “long” words overall don’t connect.’ Nanxiang laughed and said, ‘You don’t know, Sun Wukong drives the somersault cloud, which is 180,000 miles, isn’t this road long?’
The host wanted to fine Gao’s wine, Gao pleaded several times, drank one cup.
At the end was Gao’s order. Gao said six words in one breath, ‘千里言召禾口’ (Thousand miles word summon grain mouth).’ Zhongqing thought, ‘Only seven words total, he says six, doesn’t he fear people thinking? Must be using the split character method to confuse people.’ He said, ‘These six words of yours, are they “重詔和” (repeated decree and) three characters? If you don’t explain, we’ll stop the exam.’ Gao, guessed by him, just nodded with a grin. Zi Yu matched “卓言貫” (outstanding words penetrate) three characters, Nanxiang matched ‘品陽長’ (grade sun long) three characters, Wang Xun matched ‘一齡慶’ (one age celebrate) three characters, Wenzhe matched ‘品奸動’ (grade treachery move) three characters, Zhongqing matched ‘管毫定’ (manage hair fix) three characters. Gao again continuously gave four characters ‘九喜氣鳳’ (nine happiness air phoenix).
Zhongqing said, ‘This isn’t splitting characters, I’ll match “一高標兔” (one high standard rabbit).’ Wenzhe said, ‘I’ll match “一歡心雞” (one joyful heart chicken).’ Wang Xun said, ‘I match “第長年龜” (rank long year turtle).’ Zi Yu matched “超元精人” (surpass origin精人), Nanxiang matched ‘一精神龍’ (one spirit dragon). Gao, behind people, wrote the upper match, put down the pen, looked at everyone’s for a while, laughed through his nose, then used paper dipped in wine, wiped all the characters on the powder board. Everyone was amazed, said:
“It’s strange, is there not a single good one?” Nan Xiang said, “No, no, if it weren’t good, he would definitely have written it to mock someone. I’m trying to remember the characters he used, to see if they form a sentence.” Zhong Qing said, “When he was writing, I saw that the first characters were ‘风诏’ [fēng zhào].” Zi Yu thought for a moment and said, “Could it be the line of poetry ‘凤诏九重和喜气’ [The phoenix decree fills the nine layers with joy]?” Nan Xiang replied, “Exactly right.” Gao Pin said, “No, no.” Zhong Qing said, “Let’s each write out a matching line, then it will become clear.” Zi Yu said, “My line ‘人言超卓贯元精’ [People say surpassing brilliance permeates the origin’s essence] doesn’t seem good, but there’s nothing wrong with it.” Nan Xiang said, “It’s because his pseudonym is Zhuo Ran, and this ‘Zhuo Gui Yuan Jing’ [Brilliant Noble Origin’s Essence] is due to his inability to resist.” Zhong Qing said, “Mine is ‘兔毫一管定高标’ [A rabbit’s whisker pen sets high standards], surely because of the words ‘rabbit high,’ which offended him.” Wang Xun said, “I remember it being ‘龟龄第一庆长年’ [The turtle ages first, celebrating longevity].” Nan Xiang said, “Good match, good match, it’s decided, then what is this about?” Wen Ze said, “Don’t you see him sitting proudly at the head?” Nan Xiang nodded and said, “My match clearly points to him.” When everyone asked why, Nan Xiang said, “龙阳一品长精神’ [The noble spirit of Longyang endures].” Wen Ze said, “Mine is even more revealing, ‘鸡奸一品动欢心’ [The top rank rooster stirs joyful hearts]. It’s strange, why bring up names and surnames, and start insulting him?” Nan Xiang said, “It’s the natural justice for those with sharp tongues.” Gao Pin said, “What are you blindly guessing? My matching line isn’t like this. Since your matches don’t make sense, better not to embarrass yourselves, do we have to embarrass ourselves?” Everyone said, “Those of us who are down to earth, aren’t afraid of embarrassment, just say it.” Gao Pin pointed at the clock and said, “Look at the time, shouldn’t we eat now?” When everyone looked, it was already well past the hour of Hai [9-11 PM]. Wen Ze said, “Is it true or not? Tell us so we can eat.” Gao Pin said, “Even if it is true, how about I score a little advantage?” Then everyone had dinner, washed up, and since it was getting late, they took their leave.
While Zi Yu was walking, he said to the host, “This garden is decorated very elegantly.” Wen Ze said, “What garden? It’s not even a tenth of Xu Du’s Xiang Yi Garden. I’ll take you there sometime.” As the host and guest were talking, Gao Pin said to Zhong Qing, “Did you know that another gem has arrived in the capital?” Zhong Qing smiled and said, “I suppose it’s a brother of Gao Pin.” Gao Pin said, “This person could indeed be my brother; I hear he’s also from Nanjing and now resides at Chong Ji Temple, though I haven’t had dealings with him. He seems very cultured and well-off. Do you know who he is?” Zhong Qing said, “That’s strange, you’re in the same temple and don’t recognize each other, yet you ask me.” As they spoke, they reached the doorway, and everyone boarded their carriages and went their separate ways. This gathering of scholars had its share of worldly men finding pleasure in hardship, seeking amusement yet finding none.
Stay tuned for the next part to find out more.